UMD-insecure: Top 10 Funniest Tweets About The UMD Wi-Fi ⋆ College Magazine

On Tuesday, UMD Alerts sent out the least surprising message we’ve ever received: the Wi-Fi was down. If you’ve been on campus, like, ever, then you know that wifi outages are about as common as falling asleep during an 8 a.m. or avoiding the bake sale people in front of Stamp. You’d expect the University of Maryland to anticipate the Wi-Fi needs of 30,000 students, but I guess they just forgot. Just like I forgot to upload that assignment at 11:59 p.m. Oops. This semester’s wifi has been especially terrible, so when UMD sent out this alert, the terps got to tweeting.

1. Financial Aid

UMD-secure is about as secure as my financial situation

— angeline | BLM (@angelineking47) September 13, 2016

Life imitates art. Or in this case, Wi-Fi imitates lack of funds.

2. Catching These Hands

https://twitter.com/_handyMANI/status/775734027634499585

Those are fighting words, UMD.

3. Walking A Tightrope

https://twitter.com/rebamals/status/775706548895088640

Harness? What harness? Exactly. UMD Wi-Fi, where you at?

4. Pepe Testudo

UMD students when umd-secure actin up pic.twitter.com/VynnEYGoZF

— Kye Dolla $ign (@_Kyeezy) September 12, 2016

We just take the “L” every single time.

5. The Best at Being the Worst

Shoutout to umd-secure for doing an exceptional job at staying consistent with one thing: letting me down.

— natalie grim (@natalieegrim) September 13, 2016

UMD may be a top research institution, but its Wi-Fi definitely takes last place.

6. Rice Can Fix It

someone put umd-secure in rice please.

— jaye (@jayeascending) September 12, 2016

Stick it in rice— maybe that’ll help. We’re desperate at this point.

7. Bad Things, Good People

https://twitter.com/shenancygans17/status/775374780694495234

All around us are familiar Wi-Fi’s, worn out log-ins, worn out networks… #MadWifi

8. Loading

umd-secure got me like pic.twitter.com/pvsnGaiddS

— hyonny buns (@minhyon224) September 3, 2016

I’ve stared at these screens for over an hour. Trust me, they won’t load.

9. New Wi-Fi, Who Dis?

You decided to wait to do that homework the night before it's due? Sounds like a good time to go down

— umd_insecure (@umd_secure) September 13, 2016

To all those comp-sci majors out there: Do your homework! Otherwise you’ll get hired at UMD’s IT department, and we all know how that ends.