As the days creep closer and closer to the beginning of the academic year, one question constantly nags at your every thought: Should you pack your summer romance up along for the ride back to school, or is it time to call it quits?
Summer Lovin’
Most summer relationships for college students start once they leave their universities. They normally begin due to mutual home friends or through meeting new people at summer jobs and internships. The summer months allow students to focus more on their relationship and less on other expectations, due to more free time, said Robyn Fielder, a clinical psychology doctoral student at Syracuse University. “These relationships are normally less imposing and begin on more relaxed terms,” she continued.
Fielder explained that due to the increased trend of the “hook-up experience,” students are less prepared for a committed relationship. Instead, these summer romances are exciting to both individuals involved, and can transform into a more carefree relationship than those beginning during the academic year, because of less stress. But this excitement can soon turn into nervousness once the days before classes grow nearer, knowing that many must make the decision on whether to stay in his or her relationship or begin the semester single.
Don’t know if you should stay?
“I think its more being afraid of commitment,” said David Everett, a college senior at La Salle University. “If people don’t want to be committed, it won’t work.”
Lack of commitment, distance and unavailability due to classes or extra curricular activities, can all be reasons to end a summer relationship. Alexis Airall, a junior at Temple University explained, “College students are mostly still in the mindset of doing whatever they want, living wild, and aren’t truly focused on the overall relationship.”
But should you call it quits?
Ending a relationship is not always a negative thing. If you know that during the academic year you wouldn’t be able to maintain a healthy relationship because of time, it may be better to simply let it go. Holding on to the relationship may cause more stress to both you and your partner, turning a once-happy relationship into a disastrous one.
Continuing the Romance
A relationship starts with a mutual desire to get to know another person on a deeper level and should continue if that is still the main focus. Danielle Knott, a junior at Chestnut Hill College agreed and explained that a change of season shouldn’t be the basis of the status of any relationship; “It’s more about a mutual desire and understanding,” said Knott. “Seasons are irrelevant.”
During the academic year most students juggle class, work, extra curricular activities, sports and a social life. To keep a relationship going it is all about balance and trust. If both people trust that the relationship will be monogamous and that they will support each other, the relationship should be fine–-it’s more about the drive each person has to make it happen. If both or one of the partners are not committed to the relationship, it is bound to simply fall apart.
The end of warm sunny days and cool nights shouldn’t shy students away from their newfound relationships, but it is a decision to think about carefully. After all, a warm body is always nice during the wintry season.
